i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
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This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
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starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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