I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize