Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
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