You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
this hospital has no fireball
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
