Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize