I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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