Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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