she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I understand Curling. That high.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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