What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
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If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
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How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
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