Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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