is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I'm bleeding and have questions
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
