Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
