white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
