I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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