I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Everyone says I win the strip club
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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