i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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