Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Randomize
