pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize