just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
