Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
