Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
