I'm laying in your front yard are you home
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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