she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
