Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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