As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
