Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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