Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Randomize