For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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