i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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