Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
My dick has a subreddit
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
