Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
