I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
no you cant smoke seaweed
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
