honey bunches of taint.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
