Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
it's like iHOP with fire
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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