The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize