Texts From Last Night

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  (760): View more from California

  i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.

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  (760): i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel. http://tfl.nu/n5cq
  Replies (177) Good night (5122) Bad night (4962)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special

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  (586): it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special http://tfl.nu/7k86
  Replies (79) Good night (1152) Bad night (5782)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.

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  (732): obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong. http://tfl.nu/4d0b
  Replies (19) Good night (972) Bad night (6392)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  wanna hang out tonight and remember it?

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  (717): wanna hang out tonight and remember it? http://tfl.nu/5q3c
  Replies (18) Good night (6132) Bad night (1685)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.

  (1-352): View more from Florida

  What?

  (352): View more from Florida

  Just dont open the beer drawer.

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  (352): Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge. (1-352): What? (352): Just dont open the beer drawer. http://tfl.nu/02la
  Replies (16) Good night (1658) Bad night (5754)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?

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  (817): Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for? http://tfl.nu/2cqu
  Replies (5) Good night (3636) Bad night (1139)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it

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  (910): he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it http://tfl.nu/qxjz
  Replies (13) Good night (3868) Bad night (1316)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me

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  (+44): Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me http://tfl.nu/dbfn
  Replies (9) Good night (1071) Bad night (4189)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.

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  (702): I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat. http://tfl.nu/7ors
  Replies (13) Good night (4196) Bad night (1146)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?

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  (517): i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother? http://tfl.nu/7lqg
  Replies (8) Good night (1935) Bad night (1051)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.

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  (618): His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark. http://tfl.nu/bjsg
  Replies (9) Good night (1184) Bad night (1344)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.

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  (203): I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food. http://tfl.nu/xhm6
  Replies (1) Good night (464) Bad night (332)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?

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  (716): Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back? http://tfl.nu/1bv2
  Replies (0) Good night (373) Bad night (149)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...

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  (920): So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works... http://tfl.nu/tg33
  Replies (5) Good night (465) Bad night (296)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!

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  (267): It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?! http://tfl.nu/8j1j
  Replies (3) Good night (441) Bad night (211)

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