Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry DownUnder3065 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(843): View more from South Carolina

THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in

(843): View more from South Carolina

Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.

Fav 5 876 2706
share tweet
(325): View more from Texas

That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.

Fav 21 3422 1483
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(403): View more from Alberta, CA

That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome

Fav 25 5870 1254
share tweet
(925): View more from California

she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"

Fav 15 4866 1278
share tweet
(917): View more from New York City

every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.

Fav 16 4238 1223
share tweet
(219): View more from Indiana

I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.

Fav 13 1223 1614
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(401): View more from Rhode Island

The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.

Fav 15 2805 971
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(314): View more from Missouri

A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.

Fav 1 370 339
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(207): View more from Maine

Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill

(860): View more from Connecticut

Wow. He is an expensive lay

(207): View more from Maine

I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment

Fav 0 53 8
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT