you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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