Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
