I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
