Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
