So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
My bed smells like the plague
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize