K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
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