i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
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