u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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