I CAN MOONWALK!
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize