Hey man sorry I got all grabby
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
