did you get engaged???
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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