Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night