You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
i need some magic done to my vagina
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
