I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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