I like my sex mixed with concussions.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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